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What to know about dating a black woman

opinion

One night in Sydney, I was a little taken by a year-old woman in a gay bar. She was a chatty and congenial Aussie, with a distinctive no-bullshit edge. There are too many of those in Sydney… and Cape Town… and New York City… and pretty much everywhere with thriving gay nightlife! She was definitely my kind of girl. And as it turned out, I was her kind of guy. One of the first things she told me was how attractive she finds black men.

As I mentioned, we were in a gay bar. She had absolutely no ulterior motive and no shot What to know about dating a black woman me. She was just making conversation, and she was doing most of the heavy lifting, so I let her flex her stuff.

Actually, I find them more attractive than white people. I also like white men. I find them beautiful, too. But I just find black people to be better looking. The men are just hotter.

She must have read my mind when she made the disclaimer about finding white men attractive, too. I hate any kind of exclusive or discriminatory thinking when it comes to race and sex, even when it works in my favor. I have no problem with racial preferences.

But in reality as well as on TV and in movies, the highest-profile interracial couples have been white women with black men. I have a theory about white women and black men, and it goes a little something like this.

She is dating another Asian...

However, once their curiosity is satisfied, their long-term behavior is probably less likely to be racially motivated. And I realize there are always exceptions. One can probably say the same thing about gay black men who date white men.

Again, this is not a blanket theory. I once presented this idea to a friend a white guy who dates black men exclusivelyand he had an intriguing response.

Interracial love and lust, from...

He said it probably has to do with the male emphasis on the physical. Men are driven primarily by physical attraction when choosing a partner, while with women, other factors can play just as vital a role. I knew the woman I was talking to probably never would have been having this conversation with a white person. Clearly I was first and foremost a black man to her… a gay black man. But this was not a pick-up, so I let her continue.

And her high praise included...

She started to tell me about the guy she lost her virginity to 20 years earlier. He was black, and they remained great friends. Now here is where our interaction started to venture off the rails. She pulled out her phone and began clicking through photos.

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